Monday, May 4, 2009

Lesson #742 taught to me…


yesterday by one of my hometown's police officers.

Here is a listing of what you CAN DO and get away with:

1. You can recklessly drive 50+ miles per hour on a heavily populated, residential neighborhood street, some 200 feet from a park, while transporting four 12 year-old girls in your vehicle;

2. You can be impaired while driving said vehicle – but unless the police witness you driving – you can claim that even if just 5 minutes have passed since you recklessly drove, that you were so “nervous” because of the aftermath, that you had to run inside your house and “medicate” immediately;

3. Your reckless driving can be witnessed by no less than 8 adults, some of which have legal track racing experience; and some are younger than 30 -- possibly not being as freakishly sensitive as some of an “older” generation and have nothing bad come out of it;

4. You can then tell the only neighbor that shows up at your house after witnessing your dangerous driving that you were going “40 or 50”....and then change your story when the police officer arrives to “I was only going 35!”

Now...as a concerned resident of such street, a mother of two-now-physically-grown children, and a daughter of a man who was not beyond hurling 2x4’s at car’s speeding down her quiet dead-end neighborhood street “back in the day”......

here is what you CANNOT do....

under no circumstances, are you allowed to step on said reckless driver’s property to discuss her driving habits.

Because at the end of the day....you, a gal possibly possessing the last name of Snippet’s, who in 30+-years-and-4-different-homes-owned HAD never called the police on a neighbor...out of all the wrong that was done on that lazy Sunday afternoon....might be the only one brought up on charges of the trespassing variety.

hating neighborhood anxiety

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'll bail you out, unless we end up in adjoining cells.
No worries... all will be safe and fine.
-phatty

Diane Vogel Ferri said...

Wow - a sad and scary story, Susan